Rick Santorum
With a frighteningly high place finish in the Iowa caucus last week, all of the sudden Rick Santorum is warranting actual, serious attention. Up until Iowa, Santorum was one of the only Republican candidates who had not had his 15 minutes of not-Romney front-running fame. Indeed, Santorum has been such a joke throughout the race that, until Iowa, Santorum’s own website came up second on google to a website hilariously (and anally) defining his last name.
Santorum’s outlandish Iowa-fueled surge came to a 9.4% trickle in New Hampshire, where he took fifth place, with only the other anti-gay Rick behind him. Although in New Hampshire he seemed to be back where he should be in the contest, South Carolina’s primary is next up, where he has spent $1.5 million in ads and is hoping for a high finish in the socially conservative state. In deep-seated fear that Santorum may continue to be a Romney challenger throughout the rest of the primary season, I thought it wise to share with the qPDX readers exactly what Santorum thinks of you, your love, and your queer-ass sex (or queer ass sex. Or both, really.)
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