New Years for the PDX queer

Have a gay ol' New Years Eve!

Whew! That little snafu this weekend threw me off, but this little procrastinator always comes through in the end. I need enough time to peruse the New Years Eve celebration choices myself at least to prepare for next weekend. So let’s take this trip of queer New Years Eve in Portland:

Tag-a-Fag New Years Edition – For the traditionalists among you, Red Box (what my roommate adorably dubbed the Red Cap/Boxxess complex 1035 SW Stark) TAF will be two rooms full of boys waiting to have their bodies written on. And, in an oddly 2005 style, free trucker hats to the first 100 people in the door. I’d be more stoked about $2.50 wells but that’s just me.

Crave‘ presents a GagaDonna New Years – Quintessential where the girls are usually gets packed early on and stays that way until close. It can be tough fighting the crowds but how do you blame them when the space is night, the jams are pumping, and the drinks are stiff? Plus this is the only place I know of to get real lezzie lap dances from hot ladies. They may be popular, but don’t dare the Crave ladies mainstream…after all they advertise moi, and Lord knows I’m a mouthy queer.

Hamburger Mary’s MasquerAIDS Ball – Apparently the age of the AIDS joke is upon us, not sure how I feel about that, but I do love Mary’s and the hardest workin’ stoners I’ve ever seen ChiChi and Chonga. At masquerade ball anything can happen and they aim to outdo their haunted opening so you better wear a mask, not just because you’ll save $3 on entrance, but because you’ll need to have your face covered in case of photographic evidence of the night.

New Years Eve Cream & Suck with the Butt Plug Klub – Probably the dirtiest party in town this should all be the most popular underground event if that’s not too much of an oxymoron for you. Blow Pony‘s DJ Airick, Gaycation‘s Mr Charming Bent‘s Roy-G-Biv take over one of my new favorite venues, Saratoga (6910 N Interstate Ave). Divey enough to have cheap drinks and a lounge corner straight out of Eric Foreman’s That 70s Show basement Saratoga still has a kickass dancefloor big enough for everyone. And with a DJ lineup like that I really do mean everyone. Expect to find me here.

Hot Flash‘s New Years Eve Benefit & Charity Auction – Apparently it takes one being over 36 to think of others before themselves on NYE…Just kidding! All sorts of members of our community have been organizing benefits and charity events not only all season but all year. That said, this is one philanthropic choice you can make to inspire all of 2011. Or just a good place to meet a sugar mama…

NYE at Holocene– Not strictly a queer event ringing in the New Year at Holocene (1001 SE Morrison) will have plenty of gay cast members. BeyondaDoubt aka Casey Minatrea is one of the most skilled DJs in town that still manages to get people on the dance floor, obscure or funky as her beats may be. Copy, aka keytar-wielding Marius Libman, is also a gay bearded musical demi-god and his heady electro is infective.

Darcelle‘s 44th Annual New Years Eve Extravaganza – Join Portland’s oldest and most well known drag queen for a night of elegant drag. Show ends just in time for a midnight breakfast buffet. You know it’ll be good, as the 80-year-old reigning queen has been all about holiday food this year.

30th Anniversary Platinum Ball – CC Slaughters is just a damn good all around gay bar. Drinks are cheap. It’s mostly men but has a fair amount of ladies. There’s room to dance and room to sit. And a $10 cover is pretty damn reasonable for a night hosted by Bolivia Carmichaels with DJ Dougalicious and a midnight champ toast.

Flipside‘s NYE – Basically, if you’re in Salem and don’t want to truck it up to Portland this is the place to be. DJ Magic 1, drink Specials…$5 cover and the best sound system in salem. ‘Nuff said.

Lastly but certainly not leastly, JunKtion‘s New Queers Eve at the Local Lounge (3536 NE MLK) and Gayborhood‘s get down at the Foggy Notion (3416 N Lombard) are perfect for those Nor’easters who just want a quiet celebration in the hood. I do wish that these often competing events, with their similar hometown feel might combine, but the good part is that you can probably walk home whether your in the far reaches of Nopo or right in the N/NE inner divide.